Volunteering: For the Selfish Good

credit: www.freedigitalphotos.net
Credit: www.freedigitalphotos.net

As we celebrate Volunteer Week, we look at volunteers and all their accomplishments for the community.  There is no doubt that as a society we need to be grateful for those that step up and pitch in, whether that be as a formal volunteer or a community helper that simply steps forward when someone is in need.

Today I want to look at volunteerism from a completely selfish point of view.  I volunteer for many reasons and many of them are completely self-centred.  I don’t believe that it diminishes the gift one bit.  It only makes it a win-win situation.

Direction

My first volunteer position was as a Big Sister when I was 18 years old.  I had no clear idea of what I wanted to do with my life and I thought that getting involved would help me figure it out.  I spent 2-4 hours a week with my little sister.  She was 6 at the time and living in a foster home with her foster Grandma and 2 younger sisters.  I stayed involved with my Little for a long time.  I was 21 when she and her sisters moved into her permanent home out of town.  During that time there was laughter, ice cream, bike rides and a few tears.   I learned how lucky I have been in my life, how good a little hug can make you feel and that indeed I wanted to be in a helping profession.  She gave to me, much more than I ever gave to her.  She gave me direction.

Connection

While I was in University I explored some other options.  I found a place called Student Help.  It was a peer support team at the University of Alberta (now called the Peer Support Centre).  I learned skills in crisis intervention, helping skills and most profoundly about people (not to mention that a good beer tastes better when shared by the pitcher).  I loved the work but I also found people just like me, other people driven to help.  Eventually I was given a job at Student Help, got paid to be there and it is where I met my husband.

As time went on I volunteered at the Distress Line in Edmonton.  It is an amazing place where I met all my best friends.  It was a magical time of both professional and personal growth.  I continue to volunteer as a way to connect to people.  Most recently I did some work with my Dad at the St. Albert Food Bank and Community Village.  It was a wonderful way to spend time with him and do something more meaningful than a night of TV or going to a movie. Volunteering has given me connections.

Values 

Recently my daughter’s Grade 2 class was discussing volunteerism in their Health class.  My daughter came home so excited.  She got to be a special expert for the class. She got to tell the class about her various volunteer roles, how she helps the community and how that makes her feel.  She volunteers for our Community League with her Dad and for the Edmonton Humane Society with me.  We were very proud parents and more importantly she was very proud of herself.  Volunteering has helped me be a better parent and helped me teach my children our values.

Perspective

Sometimes we have to get out of our own head in order to gain perspective.  Volunteering can help you see your life in a different way and help bring meaning to the mundane.  In short it is good for your mental health. In my practice I often recommend that people volunteer if they are bored, depressed or struggling with their life. Seeing how others live, contributing to a greater good and challenging yourself to think bigger is a good thing.  Volunteering has given me this perspective.  

Meaning

I define myself as a Volunteer.  It is engrained in who I am.  So when my husband’s aunt, Gloria, was dying of cancer I felt powerless to do anything useful.  The answer for me was to get back into my comfort zone to volunteer.  It was a small gesture but I wanted to do something, so I donated my long hair to make wigs for cancer patients as a way to feel even a small sense of control.  It helped, even though Gloria thought I was crazy.  She preferred artificial hair in her wigs.  Also I think she couldn’t imagine why someone would give up their hair on purpose.  But it did help me and that counts.  Many people try to make meaning of their lives through volunteering their time and energy to a cause close to their heart.  Volunteering can help find that meaning.

There are many reasons to volunteer: some are selfless acts, others are more personal.  Regardless of why you volunteer, your community, your family and I am grateful to you for making this world a better place.  Happy Volunteer Week.

If you haven’t tried volunteering, give it a shot.  It is well worth the sacrifice.

 

2 Replies to “Volunteering: For the Selfish Good”

  1. Hi Krista: Trina forwarded this through facebook. Wonderfully presented. Trina is a true proponent of volunteerism and I am so grateful for that. My mother was an avid volunteer as I grew up and watched her commit several hours to a variety of community endeavours. Because of that we were all exposed to the other sides of lives people live. Many would say that “oh,well, she was a stay-at-home mom….and had time to give.” However, she did not HAVE to volunteer….she saw the need and pitched in” So often I think there is a deep need within to find selfworth or value through the basics of giving away our lives….and so my mother would often chime in..” quit feeling sorry for yourself and do something for someone else.” At the time I felt she was insensitive to my need but over the years I came to embrace the value and truth behind her recommendation. She is no 89 years young and I am grateful to have learned so much from living in her home….you see, she adopted me when I was 12. She saw my need. Now, several years later I have the privelege and opportunity to return a little of the life she gave me and continues to build my self worth. What comes around goes around…..that is if you keep your eyes and your heart open.
    Thankyou for your post Krista. I’ve been following your postings. May you enjoy success and more than that ….fulfillment.

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